Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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