dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
