Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize