if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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