escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
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It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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