Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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