i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
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It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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