he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
