What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
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