Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I just want nice things and good sex
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
