I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
