16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
