i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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