just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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