I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
