and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
