Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Everyone says I win the strip club
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
