dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
