I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Randomize
