I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
