Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
