No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
