I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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