What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
