While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
