ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
