respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
