hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize