She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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