tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...