There was a lot of him and a little penis
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
