I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
We had sex on a dog bed..
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
