Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
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