he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Randomize
