I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Im part way to drunk.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
