He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Did I show you my penis last night?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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