He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize