turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
