There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
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