Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Swine flu. Run for my life!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310) Swine flu. Run for my life! http://tfl.nu/6pt3
  Replies (3) Good night (889) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer http://tfl.nu/b3qs
  Replies (19) Good night (5963) Bad night (893)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer. http://tfl.nu/xrhj
  Replies (6) Good night (4090) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I just made Jack Daniels snow cones. http://tfl.nu/ca8x
  Replies (22) Good night (8175) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him http://tfl.nu/3qir
  Replies (17) Good night (3796) Bad night (1119)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation? http://tfl.nu/0s1x
  Replies (2) Good night (1213) Bad night (629)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing http://tfl.nu/ejfa
  Replies (9) Good night (1366) Bad night (909)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light. http://tfl.nu/d5q4
  Replies (20) Good night (1336) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives. http://tfl.nu/3h74
  Replies (6) Good night (1636) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (971): Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should. http://tfl.nu/ipz3
  Replies (11) Good night (626) Bad night (1011)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore. http://tfl.nu/w4vs
  Replies (5) Good night (368) Bad night (740)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present http://tfl.nu/cw7h
  Replies (3) Good night (412) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?

  (1-201): View more from New Jersey

  Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school? (1-201): Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator? http://tfl.nu/6fl4
  Replies (1) Good night (664) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them. http://tfl.nu/yzp3
  Replies (0) Good night (783) Bad night (269)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid http://tfl.nu/nlje
  Replies (3) Good night (702) Bad night (233)

Randomize