when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
she smelled like a LAN party
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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