I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize