i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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