I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
