I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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