so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
