Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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