4 words: hood of his car
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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