As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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