I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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