Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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