508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
