hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
